HOW TO GET IN THE GUINNESS BOOK OF RECORDS

GAIN UNLIMITED FAME

I know that people do crazy things to get their bit of fame and so it is with a touch of awkwardness that I admit that I too crave fame. If Paris, if Sanjaya Malakar and if Kevin Federline can do it so can I.

To satisfy this longing for fame I decided to get into the Guinness Book of World Records. Not shining at any particular sport, craft or skill you can imagine just how excited I was when I discovered that I could get into the record book by doing  something I like. Yes, and that was, downloading computer programs.

To my surprise Mozilla were arranging an attempt at a world record for the most software downloaded in 24 hours.

It’s history now but I was one of the total 8,002,530 million Region Downloads of Firefox 3 that day. Yes, I did it, and I’m in the record book.

United Kingdom 1,203,968 Israel 139,377 Italy 764,954 Iraq 1,763 Iran 535,970 India
491,690 Indonesia 145,097 Uganda 1,601 Ukraine 98,998 Uzbekistan 2,251 Uruguay
9,153 Ecuador 20,510 Egypt 62,779 Estonia 44,067 Ethiopia 1,239 Eritrea 50 El
Salvador 9,461 Australia 458,522 Austria 221,602 Aland Islands 652 Oman 3,806
Netherlands 444,104 Cape Verde 198 Kazakhstan 10,854 Qatar 12,488 Canada
801,822.

And here’s the certificate to prove it.

A few years have passed and I feel that yearning for fame has returned so I cast my
thoughts back to the Guinness Book of World Records.

Good fortune shines upon me and opportunity meets desire. I discover a chance to feature in the record book once again and as a result satisfy my need to gather more fame.

Early on Sunday morning the 16th October 2011 I will be a participant in the attempt to set a World Record for the greatest number of singing cyclists ever recorded.

That’s right singing and riding at the same time for a full 5 minutes. I have now entered into an activity requiring a high level of skill and co-ordination.This is far beyond my wildest dreams.

The plan

  • At 6.55am there will be a rehearsal on the stage GWR requirement.
  • We do not go with any other group, the GWR singers will be sent off as a group and marshalled to the other side of the Harbour Bridge.
  • We start to sing on the start line and continue singing for at the very least 5 minutes, then we start singing just before the Harbour Bridge and have to sing the full length of the bridge continuously for 5 mins, and this is also monitored, so we will  travel slow about 12km per hour, as it only takes a couple of minutes to cross the bridge.
  • Yes it will still go ahead if it is raining – let’s hope not! (I have trained by singing in the shower so this won’t worry me).
  • Waltzing Matilda is the song we will be tested on by GWR so please learn the words before the day – it’s pretty difficult to ride a bike and read lyrics at the same time and we don’t want any mishaps!

There are some GWR guidelines that must be followed to make the attempt valid:

  •  3 singing performances – the first is the rehearsal and 2nd on the start line and 3rd will start on the approach to the Harbour Bridge and must last for 5 minutes, finishing by the end of the bridge – so remember we will ride slowly!
  •  both performances must last a minimum of five minutes, during which time the bicycles must be in constant forward motion if we are to get the World record! We have to sing the full length of the Harbour Bridge continuously for 5 mins, and this is monitored.
  • The song is only 3 mins long we will do  repeats. (why didn’t we get a 5 min song, I guess that’s why I’m a participant not an organiser).
  • This also applies to the start line; yes we all start singing just before we set of for a full 5 mins!

I am so excited at being part of this World Record attempt I can hardly sleep. I’ll report in tomorrow after the event but no doubt you’ll see it on television.

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